Searching...

Like I said in an earlier post, I am starting to put myself (slowly, ever slowly) back on the dating scene. I have been divorced for 12 years now. I haven't dated at all since leaving my ex. I had so much baggage from dealing with him, that I am just now starting to shed. One of the obstacles I have to overcome is my size. I am big and beautiful. But I haven't felt beautiful, just big. I am starting to love myself. And I know that is the first step. If you don't love yourself, who will?

At the online dating service I signed up with, a question was asked on one of the message boards. What do women think when they hear a man say he is attracted to BBW's? I had answered, and included the statement that what I really want, is a man who doesn't prefer a particular body type. What I should have said, is one who doesn't limit himself to one type. Anyway, that sparked off quite a debate. *rolls eyes* But what I was trying to say, is there are so many things that make a person attractive. And I am so much more than a body type. I pointed out that I would have the concern, if I was with a man who only found BBW's attractive, and I lost weight (which is a goal for me), would I have to worry about not being attractive to him then? I mean, it's the same for women who are slim (I am assuming, as I have never been slim), having to worry if there is weight gain, is the man still going to be attracted?

But this has got me to thinking... should a person, at some point, give up your ideals, and "settle" for what you can get? I don't mean that I have a list of requirements, and failure to have all eliminates someone... not anything rigid like that... but is there anything wrong with believing that I have a soulmate out there? I guess it's because I don't have an exact "type"... I find so many different things appealing. And that's what I want in return. Of course, I am human, and I do have deal-breakers... ya gotta have a decent set of teeth... :)